Coronavirus and mental health

It's been a while. Life is drastically changing around me at the moment so I'm just taking the time to sit out and let things re-slot into place. I've been absent with friends, family and myself recently and as always, my blog paid the price.
But I'm here today to talk about mental health -as if I ever talk about anything else on here these days. It's a tough time in the world right now, the globe is being faced with something we've not really dealt with in our lifetime before, except from obviously HIV and ebola, but this seems a lot more scary than them, but maybe I was just too young to really be affected by it. I don't remember worldwide quarantines being a thing though, I'd check for the facts for the sake of this post but I'm honestly feeling too deflated to.

I'm not in quarantine yet, I work in a job that has an NHS contract so we have to legally stay open in case of emergencies - which are rare so our days are filled with nothing but sanitising the building and everything in it. Our hands are cracked and dry and sore, and we're honestly bored off of our tits because business is definitely not booming.

Anyway, I'm not in quarantine yet, but I'm preempting the mental health dip I know is coming my way. I don't do well inside the house, even on my days off I have to go out and meet a friend or do some shopping or go for coffee or something! Because my head doesn't do too well with sitting still, it just seems to eat away at itself.

I'm not even in quarantine yet but I'm already struggling.

It's not a fun time for mental health anyway, the sheer newness and uncertainty of this virus is causing massive amounts of anxiety, let alone the paranoia every sniffle, cough or sneeze gives me. The inability to see friends or be around the people who anchor you, or even go gym and get your endorphins going... I can't do anything that makes me feel good.
And let's not go into the pressure of trying to lose weight when I'm stuck at home eating 25/7 with no access to the gym and feeling like I'm piiiiiiling weight on!

The biggest anxiety factor for me is the economy. I don't see how we as a country will get back on our feet again after such an extended period of time, because this virus isn't going away any time soon. And people are being made redundant left, right, and centre. It's scary.

People are scary, the bizarre actions people are taking to "be safe" during the pandemic is crazy, wiping shelves clean for baby milk and nappies... and toilet rolls?????? Why????? Why is that what people went for???

But back to the job situation, my boss is great and doing everything possible to keep us in a job, but we're barely making any money, and not allowed to fully close, and the uncertainty as to whether the company could eventually go bust is crippling. I'm sure we'll be fine, but no one really knows.

And that's the problem, no one knows anything, we can't say something will be okay or the virus will run it's course or that supermarkets will stock up quick enough, or that we'll get to see our friends again before the year ends. No one knows. It's scary.

I didn't really take it seriously until a few days ago. I knew obviously it was killing people and it was spreading fast, but I wasn't scared of the illness itself. Now I'm terrified my little brother with breathing difficulties might not fight it, or my friend's grandparents who have their age against them... Suddenly the reality that I could lose people I know is slapping me in the face and my anxiety is so high and I'm not even in quarantine yet!!!

So, I was supposed to talk about how I was planning on keeping a check on my mental health during the inevitable quarantine, but apparently I had some thoughts I needed to get off my chest about how I'm feeling right now.
I guess, what I'd like to say is, check in on people, call your friends, send them love and try and understand where someone is coming from if their mental health is off the charts right now.
Hopefully my next post will be how I'm coping and dealing with mental health during these times, mostly because I'd like to think I am taking measures to cope and deal with things, I know too well how much I like to curl up and let my head consume me.

Stay safe and take care x

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