...Here's What's Going On Right Now

I'm trying to hard to sort my life out right now, I've got caught behind on so much and stopped looking after myself, so I'm having a random spur of quick-get-everything-done. Which actually, essentially is just, do some washing, tidy my room and get up early tomorrow and to the gym and then uni. Why these feel like impossible tasks right now I don't know.
While I've been dashing around my room sorting washing etc I realised I was mentally writing out a blog post in my head and couldn't physically do anything more until I sat down to write one.
I've been contemplating for a while about coming back onto my blog, I've written a few posts which were never finished because I physically couldn't finish them.
All I want to do is update the blog on the crazy new current situation that is my life but because my heads been so "bleh-way" (the only spelling I can somewhat sum up what the noise in my head is shouting) I've never found how to end them.
Because to be quite honest, I have no idea how I feel about the changes in my life, they're everything I've always wanted, I'm at exactly the right place I want to be right now. But everything is such a huge challenge for me. I'm stuck between absolutely loving my life and feeling like I'm falling down a never ending pit.

So I guess actually, this might be the reboot of 'operation: change my life'.

To cover briefly, how my life is crazy right now, I started university in September to study nursing. It's great but I found myself so unchallenged because we're learning things I already know the ins and outs of which lead me to not go to sessions I have already written huge essays on.
I also, at the same time got into a relationship with someone I wanted to spend all my time with, and he works nights/weekends so it was perfect to spend all my university days off with him. Until I found myself in a trap where I constantly didn't want to go to uni so I could do other things instead.
This has now resulted in me accidentally missing important and vital parts of university and I've now reached the final week to sort myself out,  if I can actually come back from the ridiculousness of what I've missed.

But it's not as silly and selfish as just that. Since September I've had a lot of serious health issues which contributed to me not wanting to go into uni as well as living my own and having to be responsible for myself I just found myself in a situation that seemed impending doom worthy.

But I've sorted myself out! Or at least, this is a declaration to sort myself out. Here's my new operation change my life goals:


  • Go to every lecture
  • Go to the gym three times a week and have girly bestie time
  • Eat three meals of real food everyday, not one takeaway at 3pm and think it constitutes as okay.
  • Do at least one load of washing a week
  • Take my rubbish out before it overflows
  • Save my takeaway money and spend it on treating myself to something I really want, every month.

Okay, I'm not backing out of this. And I will write another post next week on how I got on. Sorted. Done. Go me.


Shan x 



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